Causes

Causes of loneliness are individual—many people feel lonely when there has been a loss—such as the death of a spouse or partner, a child leaving the home, moving away from home, or leaving a familiar job or school situation. 
 
What to do About Your Loneliness  

It isn't always easy to build and maintain relationships. It takes a certain amount of effort to meet people and stay in touch with them. There are many things you can do to strengthen your network of friends, and the results can be very rewarding.

Strengthen Your Network

• Routinely call or see people you like.
• Look up old friends or co-workers. Find ways to make new ones. New friends can add spice to your life. The friendship can satisfy both of you.
• Seek out events and social gatherings in your neighborhood or community. Look for chances to go to art displays and craft shows. Attend lectures and plays. Go to yard sales and block parties. Check newspapers and bulletin boards to find out what events are planned.
• Invite people to your home.
• Make a date to share meals with a friend or neighbor who is also alone.
• Take care of any health problems that isolate you. If it is hard for you to hear, get a hearing aid. Or talk with your doctor about how to increase your mobility.
• Share experiences and feelings with your friends. Be a good listener. Help your friends and let them help you.
• Make an effort to stay in touch. Write letters and use the phone. Send greeting cards and stay in touch with people you care about. If you have access to a computer, explore the Internet and send emails to friends.
• Get a pet. A pet can ward off loneliness. It can also help lower your blood pressure, decrease anxiety and prevent or ease depression. If space or cost is a problem, a bird makes a good pet.
• Go for a walk with a neighbor every day, or as often as you can.
• Join a book club or other hobby club.
• Join a health club or recreational sports team (volleyball, bowling, softball, basketball, etc).
• Stay positive. Stay away from negative people.

Be a Volunteer or Mentor

You have a lifetime's worth of skills, knowledge and wisdom. Share these riches with others. When you give your time, you get back a feeling that you are needed. You may also make friends. You also get the joy that comes from helping.

• Find ways to volunteer where you live. Check the White Pages of your phone book under United Way. It can help you find an agency that needs your skills.
• Donate some time to a local hospital, nursing home, crisis nursery, day-care center or school.
• Offer your time to your place of worship.
• Volunteer at a museum, theater, library, historical society, or literacy program.

Be a Lifelong Learner

When learning is a lifelong habit, life seems more rewarding. You build new skills. You challenge your mind. You understand things better. Most important, you keep growing and changing. You also have more to talk about with other people. That can make you a more interesting friend.

• Study a foreign language.
• Learn to play a musical instrument—or re-learn one that you once played.
• Take a meditation, yoga, aerobics, kick boxing, or weightlifting class.
• Take some college or community-education courses in a field that has always interested you.
• Read books, newspapers, and magazines.
• Join a Toastmasters International club. Learn public speaking.
• Join a travel group or elder hostel and see the world!